
You can use this time to sample different fields and figure out what you're interested in. Start with some self-study books, videos, and/or other material. But that's not the only route to educate yourself. There's not a single better time in history that is as conducive to learning as is now. my victory is great, and it's greatness matters to no one but me, because i have changed at last. psychedelics have allowed me to reintroduce chaos in my mind, destroying the old unbeneficial belief system, allowing for the new beneficial belief system to grow. you say i didn't grow, but how do you expect a plant with no sunlight to grow? sometimes you have to admit you're stuck, and often times you are the one that is stuck in your own head, unable to even imagine how to set yourself free. it was scary, i thought i was going to die, but now i actually feel alive. i did 4-aco-dmt once (10mg) and i finally could face all my childhood traumas that have been plaguing me for so long. but i had to change because i was stuck, stuck in a mindset that was setting me back from pursuing my ambitions for so long. i too was as attached to the perception of reality i've been used to for so long as you are, but there were clear downsides to it which i've ignored for too long no matter how much i didn't want to change.

>Nothing was risked and nothing was gained Or can I? Can I really match the efforts of those exceptional people? Do I really have the stamina and strength and natural talent to do it? I mean, I've always been behind everyone else, what makes me think I could accomplish such a challenge? Maybe I should just stay in my lane and do something else, but then I will be bitter and resentful at them because Id actually be upset with myself for not trying because I was too afraid of failing. These people really earned their success and Im deserving of nothing, but I can earn something If I choose to. Though I think I've dropped a little of my childish jealously. The emptiness in my soul has only widened. Everyone was there an exceptional individual with the skills to really do something in the world, and a lot of them had really nice bodies. The only that I know for certain is how worthless I feel for not doing anything yet. It seems like what you choose to study is a big part of you and determines not only the type of person to become but also the people in your life. I just attended a master's graduation ceremony and no I'm even more lost.
